The Shallow End Of The Mind

You may not know this, but from September 2011, most of my blog posts have been written on sick days. I say “most” because today is an almost-sick day, meaning I’m not sick enough to justify missing class, but I’m definitely not healthy enough to want to go either.

So, in the newly discovered tradition of blogging when I’m not in my proper senses, here’s a few updates on what’s been going on in my life.

1. Lent is almost over. I’d say it’s going well, seeing that I’ve not had the urge to lick myself in a feeble attempt to taste meat. Very unlike last year.

On the downside, I’ve had so much soy to eat for the past 5 weeks that I’m breathing estrogen, but the… ahem.. soft, curvy bits remain unchanged.

2. Internal Diseases has been awesome. The bees’ knees, I dare say. I mean the rotation, not actual internal diseases. The actual diseases suck muddy porcupine balls. Of course, it has EVERYTHING to do with my young, cute, adorably sweet, English-speaking teacher. He makes me want to sit and read about electron transfer in mitochondria and the influence of the cyclooxygenase pathway in the clotting system. My uni should learn from this and hire teachers who didn’t have to take a break from their education to serve in World War II.

3. Moscow still has snow and subzero temperatures. You’d think that I’ll be used to it after 7 winters, but no. I still bitch and moan about it like a whiny kid. It doesn’t help that people are doing things like parading about in their underwear while I’m trying to convince myself that I can wear a thinner jacket without feeling like my arms are going to fall off.

That’s about it, really. I’m sorry this is so dull. Here’s a picture of a hairless guinea pig to make up for all the time you just wasted.

Hairless Guinea Pig @ Skinny Pig

Baby, It’s Cold Outside..

Here’s a little update:

1. I’ve fallen twice and had a major slip once, all in the span of two weeks. I’m expecting the lower half of my body to be very, very sore. After the icing session over the weekend, I’ve decided to just fall whenever gravity pulls me.

2. Christmas was awesome and tiring. Here’s proof:

This MAY have been after the eggnog

Nothing like 'Christmas in a Cup' to start the day

Us Girls Being Fancy at Lotte Plaza

The Mandatory Party of the Bekker Family

See? FUN.

3. Classes are over, which means exams are around the corner. I have the pleasure of sitting for FOUR papers this winter. Don’t be surprised if you don’t see a post after the 9th of January.

4. November and December have been months of eating, drinking and being merry. In other words, I cannot fit into ANYTHING. Hopefully stress metabolizes all my jolly bits.

5. A new year will show up in a few days. Hopefully it starts with a bang the way this year did. A lot happened, but nothing I feel like mentioning now.

2010 in a (large) nutshell coming soon. Preferably before 2011.

Skating Rink? Where??

Every year since 2005, I’ve been trying to prepare myself for winter. You’d think it would be easy after going through it every damned year, but no. Russia is a cruel bitch like that. Just when you think you’ve gotten the hang of it, something changes.

I know it’s not Russia’s fault per se for the schizophrenic weather. It’s all the crap people do to the environment. But to all the recyclers and hybrid users out there, I know and you know that we deserve karmic points of some sort.

I can’t exactly pinpoint when exactly winter began, but I’m assuming it’s the week the temperature decided to drop from +2 degrees Celsius to -16 degrees, without a hint of snow and wind blowing from every direction that can be pinpointed by a compass.

On the 4th of December, snow finally graced the streets of Moscow. Maybe not graced…more like bitchslapped. Point is, once it snows, it doesn’t feel so cold anymore. The weather is actually pretty bearable. What not many counted on was it to get so warm that the snow melted. Over the weekend, not only was the temperature back in positive numbers, it rained. The rain that would have been useful during the summer heatwave came upon us like a million elephants in the sky relieving themselves.

Here’s the thing about rain in winter: when it goes back to subzero temperatures, the water becomes ICE. Every single drop of water on the sidewalk is now a potential neck-breaker. There is now a layer of ice at least an inch thick EVERYWHERE.

Why have I decided to whine about this? Because whining is totally my thing. And I really don’t want to read about scarlet fever. Plus the damned ice made me fall on my poor (but fat) ass.

I’ve finished walking around my virtual New York and now I’m in Tokyo. Because of the weather and my recent flu, I’ve not been able to walk as much as I’d like to. Today, after class, I decided to walk home from the Metro station, just to see exactly how treacherous the path was. If it was alright, the plan was to walk to the Metro station every morning. It seemed fine, and my mind was drifting, thinking about a thousand things at once, telling myself that all geniuses do stuff that the rest of the world dismisses as ADD.

After about five minutes of walking, I reached a certain area where I thought, “hey, this is where I fell five years…FUCK!!!” Next thing I know, I’m sliding on my butt, legs in the air, looking like a tortoise on its back. Clearly, I don’t learn from my mistakes. I scrambled to get up and continued walking, hoping no one I knew was walking behind me.

You’d assume that I would get it in my head that it’s not really safe to walk until someone attacks the sidewalks with an ice pick. Humbug! I strutted (as much as a person with a bruised butt could strut) past every single bus stop. One stop away from my hostel lay about 3 metres of nothing but ice and scratch marks from those who had slipped before. I was literally at the bus stop, but I continued moving. My pride would not let me take the bus for one measly stop. I looked at the danger before me and figured that maybe if I made gliding motions, I could get across without too much trouble. Wrong. So very, very wrong.

I took my first step/glide and nearly fell. I tried to steady myself, but my feet just kept sliding back and forth without any actual movement forward. It was like a scene out of a cartoon. I don’t know how I did it ( sometimes the brain chooses to suppress traumatic events) but I got myself to the snow and trudged back home.

On the bright side, I got 95 Nike Fuel points and managed to cross the Rainbow Bridge. I also know that I had better keep my bus pass topped up till March.

Irregularly Irregular

I could write a whole post on my futile attempts to buy Corteo tickets, but that will probably just make me super bummed. It’s bad enough the damned adverts are plastered in almost every Metro station I go to.

Instead, I shall humour myself (and possibly you) with my soliloquy.

1. The 25th birthday was pretty awesome. There was cake, gifts, ice cream, booze and karaoke. All in that order.

2. For ONCE, I have a really cute, sweet, young, male teacher for a two-week cycle. Have I mentioned that I LOVE November?

3. Snow’s not here yet, and the weather has been pretty decent. I wouldn’t mind the current situation dragging its feet for a while. At least, my pedometer is being put to good use again.

4. There’s a lot to say, but sometimes I don’t know what to say to whom, so it’s probably safer to say nothing to no one.

5. I still need something to excite me. The need is apparently so great that I’ve had dreams of  roller-coasters and Flying Fox. I’m sure being scared out of my mind will do the trick, though.

That’s all, folks!

I Don’t Believe In “FML”

Today is a real bitchfit. It’s sad, really. I was drafting out an entry about the joys of being a woman. Pinky swear. Today was supposed to be a good day, almost joyous. Then a raven decided to take a crap on it. I’m not talking a normal, routine poop. I’m talking a huge-explosive-after-a-Mexican-all-you-can-eat kinda poop.

  1. My practicals are supposed to end today. Six weeks ago, that’s what my curator said. It’s not turning out the way I expected. Apparently, doing what one is supposed to do pales in comparison to blatant lying and sloth.
  2. Today is my late uncle’s birthday, making today one of those days I wish I had a crappy memory.
  3. I tried going to church today (imagine how lousy I must be feeling) and it was closed. How about that?!!
  4. I attempted at pursuing my favourite distraction, but it eluded me. On the bright side, I have a new high score for Bubble Spinner.
  5. Moscow is hot and now, there’s haze. I want to fling myself off the 14th floor just so I can feel breeze on the way down.

It really could be worse, so I’m hoping the clock strikes midnight soon.

Because Everyone Else Is Doing It…

As always, I have an idea for a post in mind, but I’ll have to wait for a boring lecture to come up with the right words for it. That should be in about three weeks. For now, I’m just writing because everyone seems to be updating, and I don’t want to be left out.

Well, um…..uh….

Weather’s getting better. You have no idea how much I appreciate that. Now I get to walk, not skate on sidewalks. I’ve rekindled my love affair with the warmth of the sun on my face (Fear not. I ALWAYS use protection..heheh).

Lent will be over in approximately 8 days. On one hand, I’ve been good about not eating red meat and poultry. On the other, my thoughts and words are not coinciding with the spirit of the fast. In my opinion, that counts as a fail. Oh well, with God’s will I hope to live the rest of my days with greater awareness.

Oh yeah, I think the cold was literate. It got the hint and left the day after my previous post. I am pleased to announce that my skin is well moisturized, my rate of hair loss has resumed to normal (by my standards, at least) and I’m back to thinking that I’m the best damned shower songstress around.

That’s all, folks!