I hate travelling. I hate looking for flights, I hate looking for accommodation I can afford. I especially hate trying to pack for a trip. I hate the way I try to take the bare essentials because I hate lugging a heavy bag around, and I hate myself more for realising that something I considered a luxury while packing is actually something necessary when I’m already at my destination.<\/p>\n

I hate sitting in a plane for hours, I hate the fact that I might develop a blood clot in my leg that could kill me (this one’s a bit of drama; I’m so short that any economy class seat on any airline feels like I’ve got business class leg room) and most of all, I HATE the way I look rubbish in all my holiday photos because I lacked the essentials that I considered too luxurious to pack.<\/p>\n

I love being in new places, though. I love sightseeing and taking pictures of stuff, captions all formed in my head. I love observing people do what they do best and I love gobbling down local cuisine.<\/p>\n

This winter hols, I decided to get off my wobbly butt and leave Moscow for a week. My friends chose all sorts of exotic places where you’d need visas and a phrasebook. I’m a lazy git, so I chose London.<\/p>\n

Well, that’s only half true. I chose to go to London during my final winter break because I wanted to be around people who speak a language I know well and I wanted to see people I’d been dying to meet, like my cousin who I’d not seen for almost 11 years and friends from Twitterland.<\/p>\n

I could do the whole day-by-day thing and bore you to death, but I’m nice so I’ll write stuff worth mentioning. And you’ll be happy about it because if I write everything I remember, you might get fired for spending your entire work day reading a shitty blog post about a place so many people have been to before.<\/p>\n

Hands down, this was the ZSL London Zoo. Okay, I admit I have a great fondness for animals and to be perfectly honest, the zoo was the only place I really planned on visiting. You could throw me any map of London and I’d be able to spot it.<\/p>\n

It was worth all that anticipation. I spent four hours gaping at all the animals and taking crappy pictures. The crappiest of the lot was a picture of a cockroach which cemented once and for all that not even a glass enclosure was going to calm my feeble katsaridaphobic heart. Look:<\/p>\n

$\"\"$ <\/a>
The Best Picture I Could Take With Shaky Hands<\/p><\/div>\n
And this is a picture of a tarantula I took right after:<\/p>\n
$\"\"$ <\/a>
The Insect I Wouldn't Even Mind As A Pet<\/p><\/div>\n
<\/p>\n
To top it all off, the weather was great and I managed to take a nice long walk through Regent’s Park and saw a squirrel making friends\/ harassing a baby in a stroller.<\/p>\n
Best Purchase<\/strong><\/p>\n
The closest to a souvenir from London that I bought is probably the fridge magnet and postcard from, yup, you guessed it, the zoo.<\/p>\n
Of course, if you knew me well enough, you’d know that I’m in heaven when surrounded by books. I attacked bookstores with a passion and probably would’ve bought enough books to wipe out a\u00a0rain forest\u00a0if I didn’t have a tiny-ass bag. I may have bought a gorgeous evening dress, Jamaican cock flavoured soup mix and a hairbrush in London, but this book is the BEST thing I own at the moment:<\/p>\n
$\"\"$ <\/a>
Source Of Joy<\/p><\/div>\n
I was so excited about this book that I started on it even before I was done with Cat’s Cradle. The only reason I stopped reading it was because people at the airport were looking at me funny when I kept laughing out loud.<\/p>\n
Strangest Thing Heard In Public<\/strong><\/p>\n
“Shut up, you fucking Christian whore!”<\/p>\n
This was on a bus, said by a guy who bumped into a woman with groceries. Why was this strange to me, you ask? Fine, you didn’t ask, but I’m going to tell you anyway.<\/p>\n
I have no fucking idea.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I hate travelling. I hate looking for flights, I hate looking for accommodation I can afford. I especially hate trying to pack for a trip. I hate the way I try to take the bare essentials because I hate lugging a heavy bag around, and I hate myself more for \u2026 Continue reading → <\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[60,33,7,43,39,59],"class_list":["post-312","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-books","tag-travelling","tag-trips","tag-twitter","tag-winter","tag-zoo"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/hypog.net\/crazywench\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/312","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/hypog.net\/crazywench\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/hypog.net\/crazywench\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/hypog.net\/crazywench\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/hypog.net\/crazywench\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=312"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"http:\/\/hypog.net\/crazywench\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/312\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":318,"href":"http:\/\/hypog.net\/crazywench\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/312\/revisions\/318"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/hypog.net\/crazywench\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=312"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/hypog.net\/crazywench\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=312"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/hypog.net\/crazywench\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=312"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}