Far and Wide

My womanly post is half done, it’ll get here somehow. Today is another set of nonsense.

  1. Infectious Diseases’ cycle is done. Thank God. What kind of mutated person can speak for 3 hours non-friggin’-stop? There are some neurons that I’ve written eulogies for already.

    A Place Where Even Insanity is Contagious

  2. There’s this Nike pedometer thingy on my new iPod and when it syncs with the Nike+Active thingy, it has this cool point system which correlates to the number of steps I’ve walked. Being an air-headed bimbo, it totally made me want to walk till I got enough points to virtually cross the Brooklyn Bridge. Because something like this may make my jiggly finally go away, Fate decided to let it rain the whole day.

    "New York" Here I Come!

  3. Gynaecology cycle has begun. I observed a few normal vaginal examinations. One word: OUCH! Why are all the instruments so big, metallic and scary looking?!! I’m totally not looking forward to my first gynae appointment, which probably should be soon. Is it too late for a sex change?

    Say, "AAAARRRHHHHHH!!!!!"

Okay, I’m done for today.

Sometimes

I just wonder

  1. Will I ever be as important to you as you are to me?
  2. Is it possible to live with yourself when you’re with one, but want to be with another?
  3. Why are there some mistakes that we do not allow ourselves to forget, even when thinking about them is so destructive?
  4. It’s one thing to unintentionally hurt someone, but how do you bring yourself to knowingly rip a person up?
  5. Why do I let myself obsess over every act of your hand and your tongue?

The Reason I Will Die Alone With 28 Dogs Waiting to Devour Me

I’m not trying to be pessimistic or anything. I’m quite convinced that if I made a conscious effort, I could get laid. The problem is, a conscious effort is too much work.

I wasn’t really planning to dedicate a whole post to this topic, because we both know it deserves a three-volume book, but this is funny and I really owe Cheryl a post. After all, the woman is nice enough to visit everyday. :)

Here’s the thing.

I was travelling from Kuala Lumpur to Moscow last week, with a 5-hour stopover at Dubai International Airport. Seeing that I didn’t get much sleep on the way there, as soon as I disembarked the plane, I went to my usual spot where not many people sit, turned my laptop bag into a makeshift pillow and knocked out. Glorious, glorious sleep…

After about three hours, I woke up realizing that due to being so tired, I had slept with my mouth WIDE open. Eyes still closed, I was silently cursing at my utter lame-ness. I should have kept my eyes closed. I opened them to find a very attractive guy sitting next to me. Thankfully, we were a chair apart, but my face was towards him and I did not know how long he had been sitting there. For all I know, I had been showing him my wisdom teeth for the past hour. To any other person, it would have looked something like this:

A Non-artist's impression

Once I had attempted to gracefully sit in the chair and revive my almost dead right arm, I noticed that the cutie was working on a presentation about Turner’s Syndrome. Oh dear Lord, don’t tell me he’s smart, too?! I couldn’t even PRETEND  to be clever, all I had was my diary and a novel called “Llama Parlour”. Thankfully, my misery and mental self-abuse was halted by him getting up to board his flight to Dusseldorf.

Why couldn’t I be the kind of chick whose blouse opens up to reveal a super sexy bra as she sleeps, instead of ME?