The Fine Wine List

I like men. That may be putting it mildly, but let’s not get ahead of ourselves. I like many different sorts of men, but my absolute favourite group is the one that consists of awkward, gangly young dudes who look more and more like manly men ( as the K-Pop Addict would put it, Cervix Punchers) as time passes. These men are the ones who make the fine wine list.

Truthfully, there are a number of guys who make the list (mainly because I’m not particularly fussy), but although compiling names and looking for “Before” and “Now” pictures was a great break time activity, once my exams were over the thrill of the search was gone and I got lazy. So, what could have easily been a drool-worthy list of ten to fifteen gorgeous creations is now a lip-licking list of four. I know, I know. Even I don’t like myself for being such a lazy twat.

Usually, I’d gush over these fellas and give a detailed explanation as to why I’ve picked them, but I think the pictures will do enough justice. Here we go!

1. Gerard Butler

Butler during his Phantom singing days

Butler during his Phantom singing days

Look what a few years and major working out can do:

The cause of racing hearts and busted eye capillaries

The cause of racing hearts and busted eye capillaries

2. Daniel Henney

Okay, not many people know him but thanks to his “fine wine” gene, he’s getting noticed more. Really, I wouldn’t ever give this a second glance:

Even the happy trail is doing nothing for me

Even the happy trail is doing nothing for me

This chap (thankfully) has realized that less is more and over time has stopped trying too hard, resulting in this:

Only an artist like God can create such luscious lips...

Only an artist like God can create such luscious lips...

3. Ryan Reynolds

We all know him from his Van Wilder and Two Guys and a Girl (sitcom, not porn) antics. Sure, he was always getting the girls and was portrayed as the dude who always landed on his feet, but not because of his looks. No, no…it was his ability to churn out all those lines without looking like a giant corn cob. I mean, if this guy came up to you and didn’t say a word, what would you do?

Add a couple of zits and you'll have your average high school geek

Add a couple of zits and you'll have your average high school geek

But if THIS man looked at you from a across a room, don’t you think you’d sweat out about 47% of your bodily fluids? I know I’d be admitted for severe dehydration…

A testament to the perks of growing older

A testament to the perks of growing older

4. Jay Sean

OKAY. I admit, he’s the whole reason this list business came about. I wanted an excuse to put his picture up on my blog, since he’s become the latest victim of my fan-girling habit. Some (i.e. anyone who’s known him since ‘Eyes On You’ was released in 2003) may consider me extremely outdated. In my defense, he used to look like this:

Can you say, "Wannabe"?

Can you say, "Wannabe"?

The hair, the pose….everything screamed “Schoolboy!”. And he was in his early 20’s. He was cute, and that was all. If anyone remembers his video for the song ‘Stolen’, they’d probably remember Bipasha Basu looking like a paedophile with him as her date. If he’d looked like this back then….well, this post wouldn’t exist. Behold:

He makes me misspell "H-A-W-T"

He makes me misspell "H-A-W-T"

And there you have it, a glimpse of the Fine Wine List. I really do wish I had the focus to do right by the men who deserve to be up here and aren’t, but it’s not my fault my exams are done with and I have no reason to procrastinate.

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